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Poems 






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5)C!.A604814 



DEC 31 



1920 



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L 



THE OLD BACHELOR 

I am an old bachelor and live all alone, 
I make my own coffee and bake my own pone, 
I live in peace, without quarrel or strife — 
It might be different if I had a wife. 

I can go where I will and do as I please, 
So I am content and always at ease; 
For I haven't a wife to say: "Don't stay late!" 
And she would be sure to sit up and wait. 

If I stayed out late, she would say, of course, 
"I can't stand this, I'll get a divorce." 
So I am an old bachelor and live all alone, 
I make my own coffee and bake my own pone. 



KEITH 

Our home was still and quiet, we wanted a little lad, 
To laugh and romp and play about and make us happy 

and glad. 
So we sent and got a little babe, Harold Keith by name; 
He was not very strong, but we loved him just the same. 

But he grew so very fast and, oh, how he could sing! 
Began so he could read and write and knew most every 

hymn. 
But one day in June when the day was very fair, 
Jesus called him to heaven to sing in the choir there. 

3 



THANKSGIVING CARD 

All hail to thee, thou turkey, thou art safe another year, 

at least, 
For thou art too dear a bird for our Thanksgiving feast. 
But, alas and alack! — for so it now seems — 
That we ought to be thankful for just pork and beans. 



VALENTINE TO A FRIEND 

If you are gloomy, sad or blue, 
Think of others worse off than you. 
Or if tired and feeling bad, 
Think of something to make you glad. 

Think of the time when you were a girl, 
And went to school with your hair in curl, 
When Sam or Joe, or perhaps it was Will 
Looked at you with an inward thrill. 

And on February fourteenth wrote you a line, 
And asked you to be his Valentine. 
How Sam and Joe and Rob so true, 
Each a valentine sent to you. 

Full of love, each signed his name, 
And, lo and behold, they were all the same — 
"The rose is red, the violet's blue, 
Sugar is sweet, and so are you." 

4 



IMITATING DAD 

Boys really are such funny little lads, 
They try so hard to imitate their dads; 
When daddy on a Sunday morn 
Goes fishing, Johnny wants to go along. 

Mother says: "On Sunday it is very bad." 
Johnny says: "No, not when I go with dad." 
So they take their poles and away they go, 
For a mess of fish, to the Old St. Joe. 

So they sit and fish nearly all day long; 
They hear people at church singing a sacred song. 
Johnny says: "I wish I had gone to Sunday school, 
Instead of sitting here like a crazy fool. 

1*11 go to church if you go with me, dad." 
But daddy said: "Going to church is only a fad." 
Daddy smokes a cigarette, Johnny wants one, too; 
Daddy says: "No, Johnny, they are not good for you." 

But Johnny thinks : "I'll try one, it can't be very bad 
To smoke and chew tobacco and imitate my dad." 
Daddy takes a glass of beer and thinks it no disgrace, 
But Johnny must not touch it — it would be out of place. 

But Johnny says: "I'll taste it; it can't be very bad 
To drink a little glass of beer and be just like my dad." 
So Johnny takes a glass of beer — oh, poor little lad! 
He's going the downward way to imitate his dad. 

5 



Now daddy goes to the saloon and gets so very tight, 
And goes home staggering nearly every night. 
Johnny thinks it's funny — oh, foolish little lad! 
And he gets drunk so he can act just like dad. 

Johnny goes to the saloon and with dad and others tipple ; 
He promises mother he'll not drink much, only just a little. 
But now a little will not do, but he wants more and more, 
And you soon find him drunk on the bar-room floor. 

But when his money is all gone, he hasn't any more, 
The saloon-keeper will promptly kick him out the door. 
Then Johnny lies awake planning how to get some more, 
And he finally decides to rob somebody's store. 

The police soon find him, Johnny trembles and turns pale, 

And they soon land him in the city jail. 

Johnny now rapidly goes from bad to worse, 

When he gets out of jail he steals somebody's purse. 

And now to all you dads I add this little line, 
I hope you will take warning by this sad tale of mine. 
Your boys will see your virtues as well as your evil deeds, 
So I pray you to be careful, and sow just all good seeds. 

Now, boys, I do beseech you, I beg, I do implore, 
Do not imitate men's evil ways, but shun them ever more ; 
For many are going to destruction, many, yes, many a lad, 
Yes, going to destruction, imitating dad. 

6 



HOUSE CLEANING 

Well, the Spring is here again — 

And time housecleaning to begin. 

We have to paper and want to get through, 

Before all the men have so much to do. 

So I telephoned that very night, 

To bring their samples both dark and light. 

So they came that evening, although 'twas late, 

And we chose our paper and set the date. 

On the first of April they promised to come, 
And stay until our work was done. 
So we cleaned the cellars and also the stair, 
The cupboards and the silverware. 

We did up the curtains one sunshiny day, 
We cleaned the pictures and put them away; 
We washed all the dishes and chandeliers, too, 
Cleand all the woodwork, then were through. 

A week or two after the time that was set, 
They 'phoned the paper was not here yet. 
We waited and waited for them to appear, 
But the days went by and they didn't come near. 

So I inquired if they were all dead. 

The answer was: "No; but sick in bed." 

7 



So we waited until the middle of May, 

Then he brought the paper and ladders one day. 

He said, "To remove the old paper will be a task, 
Seventy-five cents an hour is all we ask." 
He worked so slow I thought he'd ne'er get through, 
I began to get nervous and somewhat blue. 

I helped scrape the walls, I made them quite wet. 
If I had not helped they would be here yet. 
They at last got through, but let me say 
They were very prompt in collecting their pay. 



FOOD CONSERVATION 

We must use little wheat bread and very little meat, 
Now, what do you think they expect us to eat? 
We must use little sugar and very little fat, 
And butter, too, very little of that. 

Now, do you think it is just quite fair 

To want us to live just upon air? 

But perhaps it would be for our country's gain 

To make us into an air - oplane. 

But we will do our part to bring about peace, 
That the sooner this cruel war will cease. 
For that is what conservation is for, 
That we all may help end this dreadful war. 

8 



GOSSIP 

Mrs. Smith went across the way to call on Mrs. Green, 
And tell her of the dreadful things that she had lately seen, 
About her next door neighbor, "That stuck-up Mrs. Brown, 
Who feels so very haughty, thinks she's the only one in 

town. 

Her husband is an engineer, and, of course, is much away, 
But she does not care for that, just so he gets big pay. 
She's got another new silk dress, a coat and hat as well, 
She carries her head so very high — oh, my, she thinks 

she's swell. 

Last night I sat out on my porch to see if she went some- 
where, 

When a man came down the walk, and I saw him go in 

there. 

He was nice looking, dressed in the best of taste, 

And to my surprise he put his arms around her waist. 

I told several of the neighbors, and they think it a disgrace. 
I think we should not speak to such a brazen face. 
She is a great church member, always goes to church, 
And to the missionary societies and helps them in their 

work. 

She never goes on Sunday to a picture show, 
And thinks it very wicked for any one to go. 
I don't believe in Christians who think themselves so good ; 
They would deprive us of all pleasure on Sunday, if they 

could." 



"Now, Mrs. Smith," said Mrs. Green, "it really is absurd 
To say such things of Sister Brown. I'll not hear another 

word. 
For I have known her since she was a little maid, 
And not an evil thing has e'er of her been said. 

That man was her own brother and as good as he can be ; 
He is a minister of the gospel somewhere in Tennessee. 
Now my advice is, think over what you've said, 
Then drink some good, hot ginger tea and crawl right into 

bed. 

Your mind must be affected, judging by the things you've 

seen. 
Go get a change of glasses; I think yours must be green. 
Get rid of that green-eyed monster that's lurking in your 

breast, 
Don't see so many sins in others and you'll be more at 

rest." 



BIRTHDAY GREETING 

Another year is added to your age, 
Another leaf is turned, 
The beginning of another page, 
More lessons to be learned. 

We know not what the year may have in store, 
But whether joy or sorrow, let us trust the more. 
I wish you many birthdays that will be happily spent, 
I wish you joy and peace, happiness and content. 

10 



HALLOWEEN 

We met one time when the night was dark, 

At Mrs. Stephens', out for a lark. 

We went as a class, a dozen or so, 

To go alone we were afraid, you know. 

For the hobgoblins were out on every street, 
The witches, too, we were afraid we would meet. 
The old hobgoblins as well as the young 
Were bent on having a lot of fun. 

Everywhere there were pumpkins with firey eyes, 
Whose brains were scraped out to make pumpkin pies. 
There were groanings and cries on every side, 
And we didn't have even a place to hide. 

With bated breath we passed tree and post, 
And our hearts stood still, for there was a ghost 
With outstretched arms and all dressed in white, 
With a sepulchral voice, a ghostly sight. 

The horns were blowing, there were showers of corn; 
We were so scared we wished we'd ne'er been born. 
We were so afraid as we looked about, 
That the hobgoblins would get us if we didn't look out. 

Witches were hiding and all black cats in creation, 
It was enough to give any one nervous prostration. 
We were so afraid we were trembling with fear, 
And glad Halloween came only once in a year. 

11 



WHEN I AM DEAD 

When I am dead and in my casket lie, 

My friends will look upon my face and sigh, 

Perhaps some one will think of me and say: 

"She helped me in the Christian way. 

When I was sick and poor, 'twas she 

Brought food and clothing and prayed for me." 

Perhaps some one will lay a flower on my breast, 
Then turn away and say: "She is now at rest. 
We will see her face no more 
Until we meet on the other shore. 
Her trials and troubles now are o'er," 
Then go away and think of me no more. 

When I am dead, some one may shed a tear, 
And say: "My friend is gone, I loved so dear." 
Then soon forget and turn away, 
And smile and laugh and be so gay. 
Perhaps some good words may be said. 
When I am lying cold and dead. 

When I am dead and still and cold, 
Some of my virtues may be told, 
Some of my faults may come to mind 
To some one who is not so kind. 
Many things will be thought and said 
Of me when I am dead. 

My spirit may have taken flight 
To that blest land of pure delight 

12 



Over on the other shore 
Where I will live forever more. 
The tenant may have moved away 
And left this tottering house of clay, 
But I will not be dead. 



THE WAR 

What is all this fuss about? Why is all this clatter? 
What's the world a-fighting for? What can be the matter? 
All the world seems upside down. Why is this dreadful 

war? 
I wish some one would tell me what they are fighting for. 

Is it just to kill each other? Will some one please explain? 
Or is it more territory that they would like to gain? 
Are they so very selfish, are their hearts so very cold? 
Are they still idolaters, worshipping the god of gold? 

The widows and the orphans cry out to them for peace, 
The many that are starving beg the cruel war to cease. 
But they do not heed their pleadings, but cause trouble all 

around. 
They are still committing murder where victims may be 

found. 

And yet they claim they're Christians, that God is on their 

side; 
But Jesus said: "No murderer shall e'er with me abide." 
He tells us to have mercy, charity and love, 
Or we cannot enter heaven and dwell with Him above. 

13 



THE DRUNKARD'S BOY 

I wish my daddy would not get drunk, it makes him cross 

and mean. 
Sometimes when I hear him coming I hide behind the 

screen. 
Then he will scold about his meals, if they're not ready on 

the dot, 
And says to mother : "You lazy thing, is this all the things 

you've got?" 

Mother takes in washings, she washes every day 
To get the things we need; she has everything to pay. 
For dad gives everything he earns to the saloonman across 

the way — 
That's why his wife and daughters can dress so fine and 

gay. 

They keep a limousine and a chaffeur, too, 

And servants to wait on them, so they don't have much 

to do. 
Just go to shows and dances and have such jolly times, 
While mother takes in washings and the saloonman gets 

dad's dimes. 

My shoes are old and worn, my toes are peeping through, 
My clothes are made from old ones — I never have things 

new. 
Sometimes the boys make fun of me 'cause there is patches 

on my knee, 
Then mother takes me in her arms and tries to comfort me. 

14 



She tells me of the temperance folks and what they are 

trying to do 
To get saloons out of our land — and they will do it, too. 
They are going to wipe out this awful thing that is ruining 

boys and men, 
And then the great temptation will be taken away from 

them. 

But now it is accomplished, our country has gone dry; 
Mother has a smiling face and I never hear her sigh. 
She looks years younger, always nice and neat; 
She doesn't take in washings now — dad buys the things 
we eat. 

Now daddy comes home at night, takes me on his knee, 
And smiles and jokes with mother and is kind as he can be. 
Now I have new shoes and a new suit, too, you see, 
And I am just as happy as ever I can be. 

Dad says he's glad temptation's been taken out of his way, 
For now the saloons are closed, they no more get his pay. 
And he says he is going to do everything he can 
To redeem the past and once more become a man. 



15 



OUR SOLDIER BOYS 

Our boys have crossed the ocean, they are over now in 

France, 
They have gone to lick the Kaiser, and are glad they have 

a chance. 
Yes, they've gone to lick the Kaiser, and they took along 

their guns, 
Enough to lick the Kaiser and all the other Huns. 

Cho. : Hurrah, hurrah! Our boys are now in France. 

Hurrah, hurrah ! They are glad they have a chance 
To help to lick the Kaiser, and they have got the 

guns, 
Enough to lick the Kaiser and all the other Huns. 

They have gone to fight for freedom, for humanity and 

right, 
They have got the ammunition to help them win the fight ; 
For they all stand for righteousness and every thing that's 

good, 
And hate cruelties and murders as every soldier should. 

Chorus. 

So they've gone to lick the Kaiser and help end this cruel 

war, 
That's what the U. S. soldiers have crossed the ocean for. 
Oh, the dreadful cruelties, the murders they have done 
To women and to children as soon as war began. 

Chorus. 
16 



But there's a God in heaven who sees everything they do, 
And surely retribution will overtake them, too. 
We all see very clearly it will be no easy task, 
But our faith in God is very strong and we know we'll win 
at last. 

Chorus. 

Some of them, we fear, must sacrifice their lives; 

They may never see their mothers, their sweethearts or 

their wives. 
The foe may kill their bodies, sinners killed the Savior, too, 
But to kill the soul they've not the power to do. 

Chorus. 

But dear ones all will meet again where they will not see 

the Huns, 
Nor any bloody Billy, so will not need their guns. 
They are going to whip that tyrant who caused so many 

woes, 
As well as all his allies and all the other foes. 

Chorus. 



MRS. DUBBS' CLUBS 

A woman whose name was Marietta Dubbs 
Was president of several clubs. 
So, of course, went clubbing every day, 
For she had something always on her mind to say. 

17 



Sometimes it was a paper, how Germany made her toys, 

And again how mothers ought to train their boys. 

Her boys went home from school, found they were locked 
out, 

And in order to keep warm, had to run and play about. 

One day there was a blizzard and they got so very cold. 
"Dad will come home soon, and oh, how he will scold!" 
It now was very late, Mrs. Dubbs arrived at last, 
She saw that daylight was fading very fast 

Mr. Dubbs came home from work, hungry as he could be ; 
Mrs. Dubbs had no time to cook, so just made a cup of tea. 
The boys got sick after having been locked out, 
They felt so very ill they couldn't get about. 

The doctor came to see them, they could hardly get their 
breath. 

He said: "What is the matter?" "Oh, we're 'clubbed' to 

death." 
Their pastor came to see them and talked of things divine. 
He said he had not seen her at church for some time. 

She said: "My duties are so many, I haven't time to go; 
My duty to my family is always first, you know. 
Then on Sunday morning I find that I must rest; 
But, my dear pastor, I try to do my best." 

The pastor's wife and sisters said they would take turn 

about 
Calling on Sister Dubbs — but they always found her "out." 
She had gone to a club which she thought was very fine ; 
But to go to church, you know, she never had the time. 

18 



Her neighbor was so sick, they said she was a-dying; 
Mrs. Dubbs could not go in, it would set her crying. 
'To go in and help I would be very glad, 
But I'm so tender-hearted, it would make me feel so bad." 

To give up her clubs she said she never would, 
So her husband and children got along the best they could. 
One day Mrs. Dubbs went to her club once more, 
There were some things she had to say — she forgot to say 
before. 

But she fell dead while talking — alas, poor Mrs. Dubbs! 
She died of complications — she had too many clubs. 
Let us all take warning, lest we club ourselves to death 
And be like Mrs. Dubbs, find we too are out of breath. 



WE ARE NOT GROWING OLD 

Who said that we were growing old? 
Somebody did, so I am told. 
Why, Methuselah would think us kids, 
Just little children wearing bibs. 

And how he would laugh if told 
That any one should think us old. 
And he would tell us not to mind 
If any should be so unkind. 

And would be very apt to say : 
"Now, little children, run out and play. 
Here is some candy, now be good little kids, 
And be careful not to soil your bibs." 

19 



THE ARRIVAL OF OUR FIRST BABY 

Where did you come from, you queer little sprite ? 
"Oh, I tomed from heaven one told nite." 

But why are you making yourself so free? 
"Dod said 'oo wanted a lile boy ite me." 

But why did you come so still and alone? 
"Why, danma heard me tear fru the phone." 

But what can you find in this world to do? 
"Oh, I spect some time 1*11 tate tare of you." 

But why did you come to us, you dear? 
"Dod spoke and said 'oo onted me here." 

But where did you get your bright little eyes? 
"Oh, I bout dem wif me out of the sties." 

But why did you come to stay, ha, ha? 
"Tause I onts Clyde Raymer to be my papa." 

But why do you look at me so and blink? 
"Tause I onts a nice mamma, and 'ool do I fink." 

But those feet cannot walk for many a day. 
"God onts 'oo to guide em in de ite way." 

But what's these hands for so dimpled and nice ? 
"Dod onts 'oo to kep dem from all sin and vice." 

Perhaps you'll get lonesome and won't want to stay? 
"Den Dod 'ill send an udder one so I tan pay." 

Well, we surely will keep you, our home's full of joy, 
For you're papa's and mamma's dear little boy. 

20 



PRAYER 

Father, 'tis darkness all around me, the clouds are thick 

and gray, 
The tempest beats about me, I cannot see my way. 
My burden seem so heavy, almost more than I can bear — 
But, Father, thou hast promised our burdens thou wouldst 

share. 

So, Father, take me by the hand, and lead me through the 

night, 
For when thou art with me, I see a gleam of light. 
Thou hast said: 'Trust me, my child, and be not thou 

afraid, 
For I will be with thee, so be not thou dismayed." 

Some of my dear ones have left me, they have gone to live 

in heaven, 
To occupy the mansions which thou to them hast given. 
And I am so sad and lonely, I here on earth am left; 
But my faith looks up to thee, dear Lord, and I know I'm 

not bereft, 

For I know that they are safe with thee, safe on the other 

shore, 
And soon we will meet again and never part no more. 
So, Father, help me on the way, may I in thee abide, 
Wilt thou be my help in trouble, wilt thou ever be my 

guide. 
May we trust thee more and more as our days go gliding by 
That we may have a title clear to a mansion in the skies. 

21 



JACK FROST 

snow, you beautiful snow! 
Whirling and frolicking in the air as you go, 
Covering the ground so bare and brown 
With a snowy, sparkling pure white crown. 

We must shovel our walks, so we can get through, 
We need not do this if it wasn't for you. 
Jack Frost is your captain; he is always around 
Where he can do mischief, there he is found. 

He freezes our pipes, he cares not for the cost, 
He cares not at all if everything was lost; 
The wind is his partner, they go hand in hand 
To do mischief and ruin all over the land. 

They are very insolent and it is a disgrace, 
You can't step out of doors lest it blow in your face, 
They will pinch our cheeks, they will pinch our nose, 
And if they get a chance they will freeze our toes. 

But they are artists of no mean skill, 
They paint the window panes down to the sill, 
They paint icy forests just as plain as can be, 
And sometimes a ship sailing over the sea. 

They care not for the dark, nor yet for the light, 
But do more mischief while you are asleep at night. 
Oh! they are so bold and so very mean, 
They rival the hobgoblins on Halloween. 

22 



What care they for the scarcity and high cost of coal? 
They have nothing to lose, not even a soul. 
But beware, ye tyrants! you will soon have your pay, 
Old Sol will soon come with his melting ray. 

And will melt you and drive you from the face of the earth, 
And you will wish you never existed or ever had birth; 
And I will tell you, old Jack, and let it suffice, 
Every one will rejoice at your demise. 

For then we will have comfort a few months of the year, 
And all through 1918, unless you reappear. 
We hope you will not be resurrected or again be seen, 
For then we will also have rest in 1919. 



CREATION 

Behold the things in nature, how beautiful they are, 
'Twas God, the great Creator, who gave them us to share. 
Look yonder at the little birds hopping from limb to limb. 
You look with wonder, and think these words, 'twas God 
created them. 

You look into the garden, flowers blooming all around. 
You see the flying insects, the ants upon the ground, 
Green grass and vegetation — from whom are these things 

from? 
God, thou great Jehovah, from thee all things do come. 

23 



You look into the forest, with its tall and stately trees, 
With their many branches swaying in the breeze. 
Hark, listen to the whispering and the rustle of their leaves, 
And to the music of the little busy bees. 

You see many cattle in the green meadows feed, 

For thou givest to all creatures that which thou seest they 

need. 
For thou didst make heaven and earth, all things, both 

great and small, 
And we'll give thee all the glory, and crown thee Lord 

of all. 



THE BLIZZARD 

Oh, it is so bitter cold — 

Twenty- four below zero, so I am told. 

Through the cracks of the door I can feel a breeze ; 

I am afraid that everything will freeze. 

But we will not worry, fret or sigh — 

Summer will come by and by. 

Listen, how the wind doth sigh, 
Comes down the chimney like a demon's cry. 
The windows are frozen, so we cannot look out; 
There will be great suffering, I have no doubt. 
But we will not worry, fret or sigh — 
Summer will come by and by. 

The vegetables are frozen, the water pipes, too. 
I am sure I do not know what to do ; 
I would send for the plumber, but he couldn't get in 
Without wading snow up to his chin. 

24 



But we will not worry, fret or sigh — 
Summer will come by and by. 

Oh, the snow, the beautiful snow! 

But we can have too much of a good thing, you know. 

No one can get out, the street cars can't run; 

There is a milk conservation, the milk man can't come. 

But we will not worry, fret or sigh — 

Summer is coming by and by. 

But now the cold weather is going at last, 
The snow is melting so very fast, 
And now the people are afraid of a flood, 
That some houses will be full of water and mud. 
But we will not worry, fret or sigh — 
Summer is coming by and by. 

The cold weather has gone, it's hot and dry; 
How the people now complain and cry: 
"Oh, it' so hot! I wish it would rain, 
I wish cold weather was here again." 
But we will not worry, fret or sigh — 
It will be cold enough again by and by. 

But now the sky is overcast, 

It looks as though it would rain at last. 

Listen to the thunder roar, 

See how hard the rain doth pour, 

See the streaks of lightning flash; 

Oh, how the wind and thunder crash! 

But we will not worry, fret or sigh — 

The storm will be over by and by. 

25 



It reminds me of the storms of life, 

When trouble comes with its toil and strife, 

Sunshine and shadows, joy and fears, 

Smiles and laughter, and sometimes tears. 

But in the storms of life our Savior is nigh, 

And there will be no storms in the sweet by and by. 



FROM CHILDHOOD TO OLD AGE 

A little child came to our home one night, 
He was just a tiny mite. 
He was naked, hungry, came with a cry — 
We feared that he away would fly. 

But we fed and clothed him, we did our very best; 
We put him in a warm bed and then he seemed to rest. 
He was so weak and helpless, did not even know his name, 
But we did not care at all for that, and loved him just the 
same. 

He soon began to grow and notice everything, 
And would look around when the telephone did ring. 
He would reach out his arms and laugh and crow, 
And take hold of things — so rapidly he did grow. 

Then he began to creep about and stand up by the chairs, 
And if we did not watch him, he would crawl way up the 

stairs. 
When he got a little stronger, he began to run about 
And get into mischief, then he would laugh and shout. 

26 



Then he began to talk and know every word we said, 
Wanted to look at pictures, loved those most that were 

blue and red. 
And when he was six years old he had to go to school, 
For after six to stay at home was much against the rule. 

So I washed and dressed him and sent him off to school, 
For I did not want my darling to grow up to be a fool. 
But when he started off alone, oh, how my heart did ache ! 
The tears rolled down my cheeks, I thought my heart 
would break. 

But when he came home smiling, his face was all aglow, 
And said he loved his teacher and to school he liked to go ; 
And then I hugged and kissed him and took him on my 

knee — 
I felt as if my baby was growing away from me. 

He soon learned to read and write and also learned to spell, 
Studied geography, arithmetic and history as well. 

When he said: "They sure are hard, but I'll get them if I 

»» 
can, 

I knew I'd lost my baby, but I had a little man. 

But my little man has grown to be a big man in his stead, 
He now goes to high school, in his studies at the head. 
When he graduated, I was so proud of him; 
He was so pure and noble, he had kept away from sin. 

Then he went to college, working his own way through. 
I prayed God would protect him, that was all that I could 
do. 

27 



When he got through college, he went back to his home 

town, 
And was honored and respected, a man of much renown. 

He then became superintendent of the city schools, 
And was much loved and respected — he had the best of 

rules. 
He met a lady who was intelligent and fair, 
Who had black eyes, rosy cheeks and beautiful curly hair. 

And they were married and had a family of their own. 
The years passed away, old age was coming on. 
And now he is so lonely, he has no family any more, 
They have gone one by one over to the other shore. 

Now he is eighty-five and just a child once more, 
Just waiting for the summons from the other shore. 

Sometimes he thinks he's a child once more on his mother's 

knee, 
Sometimes with wife and children, he laughs with childlike 

glee. 

They sent him to the old folks' home, he had no other 
place to go. 

And now I've told this story, for it often happens so. 

I have told this story from childhood to old age, 

And will let this much suffice and turn another page. 



28 



BLASTED HOPES 

Our Bill is coming home today, he's been over there in 

France, 
He went to help lick the Kaiser and was glad he had a 

chance. 
But Bill is coming home today, we cannot tell just when, 
So father hang the flag out and kill the big fat hen. 

Yes, our Bill is coming home today, he is on his way, they 

say. 
I hope the train will not be late, for I feel I cannot wait. 
But, Mary, we must hurry, we have so much to do. 
I am glad you came to help me, so put the chicken on to 

stew. 

Then get his room in order, put flowers on his stand. 
The whole town will meet them, and, of course, they'll 

have the band. 
I will make the things he likes to eat — 
Pies, doughnuts, cake and cookies sweet. 

For Bill has been away so long, two years last Saturday. 
But now the war is over and he is coming home to stay. 
What, a telegram? There's been a wreck to that N. Y. 

train 
That was bringing home our soldier boys — and many of 

them are slain? 

Bill surely is not one of them — oh, how my heart does 

ache! 
How can we stand this great suspense — my heart will 

surely break. 

29 



Yes, they are bringing our Bill home today, 
They are bringing him home to stay. 

God! help and sustain us, help us now, we pray — 
For we must lay him in the churchyard until the judgment 

day. 
And, Lord, give us faith and strength, help us that we may 

see 

That he has only left this house of clay and gone to live 
with Thee, 

That now he is safe from pain and care, safe on the other 
shore, 

And soon we will meet and never part no more. 

And give us grace, we pray, our burdens so hard to bear ; 

But thou hast promised us, dear Lord, our troubles thou 

wouldst share. 
So we will keep on praying every day as loving parents 

will, 
For we will soon be together — father, mother and Bill. 



BIRTH OF SECOND DAUGHTER 

One day in August, the day was quite warm, 

We heard a noise in the sky and thought it would storm, 

But looking up we saw a large bird; 

It was carrying something, upon my word. 

It sailed around, then came down with ease, 
And said: "I brought you a daughter, Clara Louise." 
So we kept her and love her and hope she will stay, 
To give cheer and comfort and not go away. 

30 



THE OLD MAID'S SECRET 

I am sitting tonight in my old arm-chair. 
Father Time laid his mark on my features and hair. 
I am thinking of the present, the future and past, 
And a shadow of sorrow is over me cast. 

Some call me a spinster, others call me old maid, 
And tease me by sa3ang of men I'm afraid. 
And some of the gossips say they suppose 
That no one to me has ever proposed. 

Some say I was jilted, so hate all the men, 
Others that I never cared for any of them. 
Many say I was particular, and that is all true, 
So listen and I will tell my secret to you. 

I once was attractive and had plenty of beaus, 
Could have married them, too, if so I had chose. 
But some smoked cigarettes, and would cheat and lie, 
Others used tobacco and would drink on the sly. 

Then there was that good-for-nothing Jim Brown, 
Who was always busy loafing around town; 
He was handsome and witty and full of life, 
And he asked me one day if I'd be his wife. 

But I said: "Jimmy Brown, you surely can see, 
If you can't keep yourself you could not keep me." 
But he said that he loved me, he did me adore. 
That his father would keep poverty away from our door. 

31 



But we parted, and he married pretty Isabelle Mead, 
Who said she would never be an old maid; 
Whether an American or foreigner, she would be his wife 
Rather than be single all the days of her life. 

So she married this good-for-nothing Jim Brown, 

And he is still at his trade, loafing about town. 

She supports Jim and a family of four, 

And takes in washings to keep the wolf from the door. 

She looks old and wrinkled, weighed down with care, 
Silver threads are fast coming into her hair. 
Her eyes are now opened, and she says she now sees, 
And wishes she was single, and Jim in Hades. 



THE ARRIVAL OF OUR SECOND BOY 

One day a boy came to our door, it wasn't yet daylight, 

He wasn't very large, just a tiny little mite. 

We said: "Where did you come from? Was it from New 

York?" 
He said: "Why no, a big bird bringed me here, said he 

was a stork. 
He said that you would love me and be my mam and dad, 
Because I was such a sweet and tiny little lad. 
He said my name was Stanley, den he dist went and flied 

away. 
So if you will let me stay, I'll do my best to try 
Not to be cross or naughty and not to fret or cry. 
So will you please to love me, and won't you let me stay? 
'Cos I is cold and hungry and don't want to go away." 

32 



WHAT CURED THEM 

I am Mrs. Nancy Flanagan and could hardly get about, 
Because I had the rheumatism, mixed with a little gout. 
My friends all came to see me, brought me flowers bright 

and gay, 
And some were good and kind enough to come and spend 

the day. 

One told me of a liniment that would cure me of my ills, 
'Then take internally Johnson's sugar-coated pills. 
For that's the only thing that ever helped me, 
When I had the rheumatism so badly in my knee." 

So I sent and got a bottle and rubbed it on, but say — 
The odor was so terrible it drove the rats away. 
Oh, that dreadful odor, I never shall forget, 
Although it was some months ago, I think I smell it yet. 

Another said: "Get a pint of alcohol, put an ounce of 

mustard in it, 
Then shake it up a few times and let it stand a minute; 
For it's the best of liniments, I think it can't be beat, 
For that's what cured me when I had it in my feet." 

So I got a bottle, and, oh ! how it did burn ! 
But there are always lessons we all have to learn. 
I thought my poor body must all be in a flame, 
And I also thought of a place I do not care to name. 

Then I tried to wash it off, but it only burned the more; 
I thought my poor body must be a solid burning sore. 
Then I got some olive oil, thinking that would do, 
And if I had not done so, I might have burned in two. 

33 



Another said: "Go away and take some baths, or else your 

joints will knit." 
But I did take one at home one day and it did not help a 

bit. 
"Or try a chiropractor, they do wonders, you will see, 
For that's the only thing that ever helped me." 

So I went to a chiropractor and was glad when he got 
through, 

For behold when I got home my back was black and blue. 

They rubbed me and they pounded me, my bones they al- 
most rent, 

It sounded like a circus crew, putting up their tent. 

Another said: "Try my remedy of saltpeter, salts, a little 

sulphur, too; 
I think it would be just the thing that would be good for 

you. 
I tried it when I had a pain in my shoulder-blade, 
The pain it was so dreadful I had to go to bed. 

I took a few doses and slept well all that night; 
I tell you this remedy is just about all right, 
For it cured me and I think it will you, too, 
If you keep on taking it I think it will help you." 

So I sent to the drug store and got a lot of that, 
But I think I better try it first upon the cat, 
Or perhaps upon my neighbor to see what it will do, 
And if it don't hurt her, I will try it, too. 

Then I tried the doctors — one, two, three — 

But not one of them ever did a bit of good for me. 

34 



They put me on a diet: "Use no coffee, tea, or meat, 
You must not use sugar or anything that's sweet." 

I suppose they thought I'd starve to death and then I 

would be well, 
(But of this I must not say a word — so don't you ever tell.) 
I have tried all kinds of remedies, and still I limp around. 
If you know of any more, please tell where it may be 

found. 

But I am trying to be patient and cheerful all the day, 
For it will not be long until I leave this house of clay, 
And then I will be free from pain for evermore, 
For there is no pain or rheumatism on the other shore. 



THE OLD LOG CABIN 

There's an old log cabin, shabby and old, 

Its history has never fully been told. 

A young man built it, and there brought his bride, 

And this new log cabin was their joy and their pride. 

It was built in the forest, surrounded by trees 
Whose tall spreading branches waved in the breeze. 
An old owl sat in the top of a tree, 
And wondered who in the world they could be. 

He blinked his eyes and said: "Whoo! who, 
Has come to intrude? Must be some one new." 
The robins sang by the brook in the brush, 
Accompanied by the sweet-toned thrush. 

35 



Their chairs were benches made out of pine board — 
It was all the young couple could then afford. 
Their table and cupboards and also their bed 
Were not bought at the store, but home-made instead. 

Their fuel, too, was just outside the door. 

He cut enough in a day to last a week or more. 

They made their own sugar, which was good and sweet, 

Raised corn and vegetables and their own wheat. 

They had cattle, hogs, many chickens and geese, 
So were independent and lived at their ease. 
He built for his cattle a good log shed; 
He had no horses, but oxen instead. 

With the wool from their sheep they made their clothes, 
Dresses, skirts, blankets and all their own hose. 
The wool they washed and hung upon poles, 
When dry they picked, carded and made into rolls. 

Then the good wife spun it on her spinning wheel, 
When the spindle was full, wound it in skeins on a reel, 
Then she dyed the yarn in home-made dye 
And hung it out in the sun to dry. 

She knew how to weave, so had a loom, 
Which stood in a corner of their humble home. 
And at night as they talked by the log fire sitting, 
He read aloud while she sat knitting. 

So this young couple did not worry or sigh, 
Because food and fuel and clothing were high. 
After a while two dear children did come 
To brighten this humble, happy home. 

36 



But the death angel also came one day, 

And took their darlings and bore them away 

To a better world on the other shore, 

And their home was childless and lonely once more. 

But this once young couple began to grow old, 
Their health was failing, but they had plenty of gold. 
They were patiently waiting for the messenger to come, 
To bear them to their eternal home. 

One day the neighbors found them both dead, 
Locked in each others arms together in bed. 
So this log cabin began to decay, 
The same log cabin that was new one day. 

Its windows are gone, its roof fallen in, 
Its occupants are owls and a tramp now and then. 
How much we are like the history I have told 
Of this old log cabin alongside the road. 

It is much like the houses that we live in, 

The foundations are tottering, the windows grow dim. 

Our hair like the shingles is falling away, 

We are not as young as we were one day. 

We all have our afflictions, our troubles and care, 
But let us trust in the Lord and let us beware, 
For we're like the story that I have just told 
Of that old log cabin alongside the road. 



37 



THE OLD MAIDS CLUB 

We are just the nicest kind of girls, and as good as we 

can be, 
And why the men all pass us by is a mystery to me. 
Tis true our hair is somewhat gray, and perhaps a little 

thin, 
And although we put the powder on, the wrinkles will 

come in. 

But our eyes are bright and our hands are white, our curls 
are soft and brown — 

Let me whisper something in your ear, they were pur- 
chased in the town. 

And then we are so amiable, so loving and sublime, 

And when there is a man around, we are smiling all the 
time. 

We can knit the nicest slippers, we can sew and cook and 

bake, 
And yet the men all pass us by and some giddy girl will 

take. 
And yet we are kind of girlish, not very old, you see ; 
Why, the oldest one among us is not more than sixty-three. 

Then we are not particular whether a man is lean or fat, 
There is not a woman in our club who cares a fig for that. 
Just so he is good and honest, loving, kind and true, 
For that's the kind or sort of man the old maids say will do. 

Many an old bachelor is bald as any bat, 
But, oh dear me, I don't believe they ever think of that. 
Some have got the asthma and not altogether sound, 
And some so full of rheumatism, they can hardly get 
around. 

38 



Yet they keep us in suspense and make us wait and wait, 
And I shouldn't be at all surprised if they'd leave us to our 

fate. 
But I've heard of an elixir, that will bring back youth, they 

say, 
I wish some good philanthropist would send it around this 

way. 

And then we would all be charming, and perhaps could get 

a man, 
For that is what this club is for, to get one if we can. 
But we're getting so discouraged, for the fairest flower 

fades. 
If you know of any who want to wed, just tell them of us 

old maids. 



DRIFTING 

Where are the saints so faithful and true, 

Who were always found in the old church pew, 

Singing the hymns, always ready to pray? 

But now they are absent — they have drifted away, 

To heaven they have drifted, drifted away, drifted away. 

Where are many of the children who loved Sunday-school, 
Loved Jesus, His Sabbath and the Golden Rule? 
They have drifted to God, forever to be 
With Him who said: "Let the children come unto me." 
They have drifted, drifted away, to Jesus they have drifted 
away. 

Where are the many who professed to love Him 
Who died on the cross to save them from sin? 
They once went to church every Sabbath day, 
But they go there no more, they have drifted away. 
To the world they drifted, drifted away, drifted away. 



They now love the world, have forgotten to pray, 
Are getting more careless and worldly each day. 
They are striving for money, more grasping they grow, 
You now find them on Sunday at the picture show, 
For they are drifting away, drifting away, drifting, yes, 
drifting away. 



CHRISTMAS 

What is the meaning of the day? Is it to frolic, dance and 

play? 
Is it just to eat and drink and say: "A Merry Christmas, 

a happy day" ? 
Does it mean weeks of making caps and bags, guest towels, 

crocheting wash rags, 
Making aprons, handkerchiefs and other things, 
Pillows and laundry -bags that hang by strings? 

Does it mean we must give children all kinds of toys, 
So they can make a tremendous noise 
With squeaking elephants, horns and drums, 
That make us sorry when Christmas comes? 
But should we then not all rejoice 
When we hear the Savior's voice? 
The angels' words let us practice then, 
"Peace on earth, good will to men." 

'Midst earthly pleasures we forget Christ's birth, 
Who came to suffer on this wicked earth. 
Came in love our precious souls to save 
That we might have hope beyond the grave. 
Who taught us charity and love 
That we might dwell with Him above. 
Then let us remember on Christmas morn 
That Christ in Bethlehem was born. 

40 



OUR OUTING AT KLINGER LAKE 

The weather was so very hot, there was not any breeze, 
Although about a month ago we thought that we would 

freeze. 
So we thought we'd go to Klinger Lake and get a bit of air, 
Have a little recreation and be free from toil and care. 

We hustled and we hurried, there was so much to do, 
A getting things together; we thought we'd ne'er get 

through. 
Then we loaded up our auto, we nothing did forget, 
Unless it was the cook-stove, the chickens and the cat. 

We were packed in like sardines, we couldn't move or stir, 
And suffered many tortures without even a demur, 
For we were going to Klinger Lake to get a bit of air, 
Have a little recreation and be free from toil and care. 

We were told that our cottage was right along the lake, 
But our greatest trouble was to know which road to take. 
One said : "Go right around the corner and up that steep 

sand hill, 
To get up is very difficult, but I'm very sure you will. 

For I see you have a Reo, and I think you'll get up quick, 

But any other auto would be very apt to stick." 

We got up very easily and went a little way, 

We did not see our cottage, so thought we wouldn't stay. 

But soon we spied some steps that led down hill so steep, 
We feared they led to Blue-Beard's house, and we al] be- 
gan to weep. 
But Clyde went to investigate to see what he could find, 
And when he came back smiling, it soon relieved our 
minds. 

41 



For he had found our cottage and we need not be afraid. 
The steps led to the cottage and that's why they were 

made. 
So we unloaded our auto, and we all began to smile, 
And carry down our luggage — it seemed about a mile. 

We had so much to carry, so of course made many trips, 
Before we got our bundles down, our boxes, grub and 

grips. 
But when we got our things all down the steep and rugged 

way, 
We were all so very tired we hadn't a word to say. 

We have a four-room cottage with bedding and beds com- 
plete, 
With many more conveniences that would be hard to beat. 
We have a stove and cupboards and dishes by the score, 
And a sweet-toned organ — now, who could wish for more ? 

There are tablees, commodes and mirrors, curtains and 

fancy things, 
And even little pin-trays to put away our rings. 
Then we have cold water from a running spring, 
And a refrigerator to keep our victuals in. 

We have a nice large porch with screening all around, 
With rocking-chairs and hammocks, the best that can be 

found. 
So we're glad we are here at Klinger Lake, for we get a 

bit of air, 
Have a little recreation and not much toil and care. 

Each day they all go fishing, get many strings of fish, 
Which I can well assure you make a most delicious dish. 

42 



Both old and young go boating and bathing every day, 
And they learned to swim and float a little, and every one 
did say : 

"Hurrah for Klinger Lake where we get a bit of air, 
Where there's fun and recreation without much toil or care. 
For we have left our cares and worries all behind, 
And while away, at least, we'll keep them off our mind." 

One day we went to Constantine, just to spend the day ; 
We took our dinner with us to eat upon the way. 
But as we were not hungry and the weather being fair, 
We thought we better wait awhile and eat when we got 
there. 

But we found no one at home but the chickens, dog and 

cat, 
But we did not worry over a little thing like that, 
For we had our dinner with us and we ate upon the porch, 
So you see we were not left so badly in the lurch. 

But soon our friend returned, made us welcome as could 

be, 
And soon put the kettle on and made a cup of tea. 
Then we all went riding just to see the town, you know, 
And rode around to see the sights until 'twas time to go. 

Then we bought a chicken for our Sunday feast; 

We thought we'd make sure of one good meal at least. 

For we expected company, but, of course, they did not 

come. 
The weather was so hot, thought they better stay at home. 

We got back to our cottage with no trouble on the way, 
And all declared they surely had a very pleasant day. 
So we are back to Klinger Lake, where we get a bit or air, 
Have a little recreation and not much toil and care. 



43 



Now we are getting things together, for we'll be leaving 

soon, 
If we can get things ready, we will go this afternoon. 
For now our outing's over and we are homeward bound, 
And they all declare Klinger Lake the best that can be 
found 

To get the cool lake breezes, also the purest air, 
Have a little recreation and be free from toil and care. 
But now we're home once more, we will take up our toil 

and care, 
Our burdens will not seem so heavy since we've been away 

somewhere. 



JUST AMONG OURSELVES 

'Twas one day in the winter of '94, 
When I heard a knocking at my door. 
"An agent," I said, "with something to sell." 
But no, 'twas our friend, Miss Anna Siddell — 
Just among ourselves. 

"Come in," said Alice, taking her hand, 
"And join our little social band. 
We were talking, and with all sobriety, 
Of joining ourselves in a society 

To be just among ourselves. 

We will have music, if all is agreed, 
And history, of course, we will read; 
Each one must write a little story, 
And we'll crown ourselves with sudden glory — 
Just among ourselves. 

Our stories will be read by every nation 
And we'll be the wonder of all creation. 

44 



Our fame will spread all over the land, 
And we will be such ladies grand — 
Just among ourselves." 

Then Ollie said with her sweetest smile : 
"What will we do after a while? 
Our heads with wisdom will surely swell — 
How big, I'm sure no one can tell; 
Just among ourselves." 

Each week they met thro' snow or rain, 
And each time did more knowledge gain. 
And their heads one night suddenly bursted, 
And every one present was thoroughly disgusted- 
"Just among ourselves." 

But we gathered up their scattered brains 
And put them together with greatest pains. 
And we buried them under our old apple tree 
That they forever, and ever, might be — 
"Just among ourselves." 



ON THE BIRTH OF OUR LITTLE GRANDDAUGHTER 

A stranger came to our heme, she said she had come to 

stay, 
As long as God would let her she would never go away. 
She was hungry, naked, came alone, and this is what she 

said: 
"I will introduce myself, I is Dorothy Adelaide." 

So we fed and clothed her and think she is very nice, 
And we will try and teach her to shun all sin and vice. 
For we already love her, she is so good and sweet, 
She is just the nicest little girl, I'm sure she can't be beat. 

45 



CHRISTMAS STORY— 1916 

It was the week before Christmas. Mr. and Mrs. Per- 
kins sat by their comfortable fire, Mr. Perkins reading his 
paper and looking up at his wife, occasionally making 
remarks about the war news, or the high cost of living. 

Mrs. Perkins sat contentedly knitting a pair of socks 
she intended for a Christmas present for Mr. Perkins. 

"Josiah," said Mrs. Perkins, "put away your paper for 
awhile. I want to talk to you. You know it is only a week 
until Christmas and we ought to be thinking about our 
Christmas shopping. We'll begin with our children, of 
course. There is John and Mary who are in college, will 
have to have something real nice. Mary has been wishing 
for a nice set of furs." 

"How much will they cost?" inquired Mr. Perkins. 

"Oh, we can get a pretty decent set for $75." 

"Great Scott!" exclaimed Mr. Perkins; "I should think 
we could get a pretty decent set for that price." 

"Then there is John," went on Mrs. Perkins. "He really 
needs a new suit of clothes, for very best, of course. They 
have their society parties and such things, and, of course, 
we want to have our children look as well as the rest of 
them. Now, don't we, Josiah?" 

"Well, I suppose so, but remember, Maria, we are not 
millionaires." 

"Of course not," said Mrs. Perkins, sweetly; "but 
Christmas only comes once a year, you know. 

Then there is Mabel. She has never had a gold watch 
and she is now going on sixteen. She said the other day 
that nearly all the girls at school had a watch. So I think 
we had better get her a nice gold watch. 

Then there is your father and mother. I thought we 
would get father a couple of nice handkerchiefs. You 

46 



know he has weak eyes and is always wiping them. I 
thought we would give mother a nice kitchen apron. You 
know she is always cooking, baking or washing dishes or 
something of that kind. 

And say, Josiah, I am going to be economical this 
year. For there is Sister Jane and her girls — let me see — 
there is Almira, Ruth, Mary, Helen, Dolly, that makes six 
with Sister Jane. 

Then there is Sister Lizzie and her family — Kate, Alice, 
George, Joe and little Ben — that makes six with Sister 
Lizzie. I do declare how they do pile up. But thank 
goodness, Sister Mary has only one. 

But as I said before, I am going to be economical 
this year. I went upstairs the other day and looked over 
my things that I had packed away in boxes and drawers 
for several years, things that had been given me on Christ- 
mas by my sisters and their children. I found thirteen pin- 
cushions, seven pairs of bed-room slippers, fifteen jabots 
of all kinds, ten sweeping caps, and twenty-five booklets. 

I thought the booklets would do for the boys. Be- 
sides, I found many other things and I know there is 
enough to go around, even for the cousins. Now, Josiah, 
don't you think it will be a good plan to send them? They 
are just as good as new, for I have never had them out of 
their resting place since I got them so long ago for Christ- 
mas." So Mrs. Maria Perkins had her Christmas problem 
solved and was happy. 

After purchasing the furs for Mary, the new suit for 
John, the gold watch for Mabel, the handkerchiefs for 
father and the apron for mother, she sorted out the things 
for her sisters, nieces, nephews and cousins. 

That night as she and Josiah sat by their cozy fire, Mrs. 
Perkins said: "Josiah, I feel as light as a feather tonight. 
I have my Christmas presents all ready to send off." 

47 



"Well, I should think you would," said Josiah, looking 
at the packages, "after getting all those pin-cushions off 
your mind. But what if the ones get them that sent them 
to you?" 

"Why, Josiah, I never thought of that; but I do not 
think there is the least danger, for it is so long ago, they 
surely have forgotten by this time. I can't think who 
sent them to me." 

But Mrs. Perkins was mistaken. Each recognized the 
gifts that they had sent to Maria long ago and they all 
declared that they would never send her anything for 
Christmas again. 

Mrs. Perkins wondered why none of them acknowl- 
edged their gifts and felt very much hurt when on New 
Year's day Sister Jane had a family reunion and invited 
her sisters and their families and even the cousins to a big 
turkey dinner, and left the Perkins family entirely out. 







